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teacher, Page 2

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Capital Punishment" published September 22, 2019 - Jason: As you enter the dungeon, you see before you an elderly woman. She says that in order to pass, you must answer her questions correctly. Are you ready? Marcus: Yes. Jason: "What is the capital of Michigan?" Marcus: Lansing. Jason: "What is the capital of Nevada?" Marcus: Carson City. Jason: "What is the capital of Pennsylvania?" Marcus: Philadelphia? Jason: WRONG! She shapeshifts into a demon, plunges a fist into your chest and rips out your heart! Marcus: Ouch. Teacher: About the way you two study for tests... Jason: It helps us get extra-motivated. Marcus: You see before you an elderly woman...

Capital Punishment

September 22, 2019

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Cell Division" published January 13, 2019 - Teacher says: Paige, about your diagram of cell division... Paige says: Did I get the math wrong?

Cell Division

January 13, 2019

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Energy Boost" published October 7, 2018 - Teacher says: Mr. Fox, is there a reason why you're standing on your chair? Peter says: It's to boost my energy. I was feeling a little sluggish. By my calculations, standing up here gives me an extra 300 joules of potential energy from gravity. Teacher says: Ah, but you had to expend energy to get up there. Your total energy hasn't increased. Peter says: I had Steve lift me up. Teacher says: Fall Break can't come soon enough. Peter says: Thanks for teaching us this stuff, by the way!

Energy Boost

October 7, 2018

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Fake News" published May 6, 2018 - Teacher: A reminder, class, we'll be having a math test on Monday. Jason says: Fake news! Teacher: Excuse me? Jason says: Don't believe her! She's lying! She's a teacher pushing her "teacher agenda"! You can't trust a word she says! There won't be a test! Don't bother studying! It's fake news, sheeple, wake up! Sorry just trying to lower the curve a little. Teacher: I never should've assigned watching C-Span.

Fake News

May 6, 2018

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Brains" published October 29, 2017 - Jason and Marcus say: Trick or treat! Neighbor says: Wow! Nice zombie costumes! Jason says: Who says these are costumes? Marcus says: Who says we aren't actually REAL zombies? Neighbor says: Yikes! In that case, let me grab you some brains! I'm a biology teacher, so I usually have a few specimens lying around. Sorry, looks like my wife threw them out. I'm afraid all I've got for you is this candy. Jason says: I can't decide if I'm feeling more relieved of disappointed. Marcus says: You don't suppose he was messing with us, do you?

Brains

October 29, 2017

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Busted Rhymes" published May 28, 2017 - Teacher says: Well, there's the bell. Have a good summer everyone. Paige says: School's over! No more pencils! No more books! No more teachers' dirty-- Teacher says: Ahem. Paige says: ...looks. Nicole says: So, technically there was ONE more. Paige says: I always start that rhyme like a minute too soon.

Busted Rhymes

May 28, 2017

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