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FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Questioned To Death" published April 8, 2018 - Jason says: As you enter the chamber, you come face-to-face with a 50' tall Balrog wielding a 10; flaming sword! Marcus says: Yikes! My archer readies his bow! How far away is the Balrog? Jason says: 30 feet. Marcus says: Is the floor level? Jason says: Yeah. Marcus says: Are we below ground? What's the barometric pressure? Do the flames from the Balrog create an sort of updraft? What's the humidity? Does the air feel damp or dry? Any particulate matter? Dust? Mold? Pollen? What's the acceleration due to gravity on this world? 9.8 m/s²? What about the coriolis forces? I assume this planet rotates. Jason says: ...And the Balrog dies of old age. Marcus says: Woohoo! Any good loot?

Questioned to Death

April 8, 2018

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Loot Boxing" published March 4, 2018 - Jason says: Want to buy a "Jason Fox Loot Box"? Peter says: A what? Jason says: In case you aren't aware, loot boxes are the big new trend in video games these days. Players can earn or buy them for a chance at winning cool in-game enhancements and gear. What I've done is create the world's first universal loot boxes! They can be used with any game to get any item! Peter says: How's the work? Jason says: My boxes contain either a zero or a one. Accumulate enough and put them in the right order, and any digital prize in the universe is yours! At least, theoretically. I leave implementation up to the user. It's possible I misjudged demand more than a bit...

Loot Boxing

March 4, 2018

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Details, Details" published February 19, 2017 - Jason says: As you enter the dungeon, you see an orc centurian, napping at his post. Marcus says: My dwarf warrior attacks! Jason says: But not before the balrog hiding behind the door attacks you! Bwahaha! He slashes your dwarf with his sword, causing (roll, roll) five points of damage! Marcus says: Where does he slash him? On his back? Jason says: Probably. Marcus says: How deep is the cut? Would you see bones? Did he hit an artery? Would blood be spraying out? Jason says: Dude, it's only five hit points. Marcus says: Ok, ok, how's this look? Jason says: You know, there's such a thing as putting too much detail into your miniatures. Marcus says: Is it my dwarf's turn to attack? Let me give him scared-yet-angry eyebrows...

Details, Details

February 19, 2017

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Super Rope Bros" published November 27, 2016 - A button! A button! A button! A button! A button! A button! Eileen: You know, my mom never believes my stories about recess. Jason: Because they're so awesome? Marcus: A button!

Super Rope Bros

November 27, 2016

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Pokemon Woe" published August 28, 2016 - Teacher: If you're here for biology, please take a seat. If you're here because Nintendo accidentally put a pokemon gym in my classroom, can you please do that during lunch?

Pokemon Woe

August 28, 2016

FoxTrot by Bill Amend - "Theater Rep" published June 5, 2016 - Jason: Can we buy tickets ahead of time for the "Warcraft" movie? Theater Manager: Depends. Are you revered with the Pavilion Plex Movie Theater faction? It's a prerequisite for advance ticket sales. Jason: Um, no. How do we do that? Theater Manager: My associate here has a repeatable quest that rewards 25 reputation points for every 10 pieces of popcorn you pick up off the floor. To go from neutral to revered, you'll need to gather 8,400 pieces. And if you're into bragging rights, an additional 8,400 pieces will get you to exalted, which earns you the title "Buttery Fingers." Not a lot of kids have gotten that yet. Theater Associate: I'll give you credit... the floors have never been cleaner. Theater Manager: And you said doing this would be cruel. Just look at those smiles! Jason: Woohoo! There's like six or seven behind this trash can! Marcus: Nice!

Theater Rep

June 5, 2016